I wish people understood how tiring my anxiety attacks can be. I have a headache and I’m tired from crying. My stomach hurts from crying and being tense for so long. Once I have stopped sobbing, I still have to deal with the problems that brought the whole issue on. So I want to be calm and I want everything to stop. The only good thing about having an anxiety attack is that it exhausts me to the point that I don’t want to do anything, like hitting a hard reset button. I don’t feel guilty or worried about doing a zillion things. I just want to chill. I mean, I also just want to forget about all my problems.
I need to do the dishes
fix my oven
move my couch to the curb
find out when my counseling appointment is
fix my hoses (now it’s both of them)
find a bill I have to pay
follow up with a job lead
fix the lawn mower
learn to play tennis

I want to drink a beer
watch twin peaks
go to sleep forever

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About helendauka

I used to write a lot and now I hardly ever write. I think I write bad now? On the flip side, I used to be very bad at being an adult and now I'm a little better at being an adult. Let's try to balance this equation out.

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